Learning about "Letting Go"
I’ve been working on the ability to “let go” for quite a while now….years actually. Letting go of the past. Letting go of pain. Letting go of how I thought my life “should” be and accepting it for the blessing it is. Letting go of anger. Letting go of fear. Letting go of sadness. Letting go of the need to control what’s going on around me in order to feel safe. Letting go of expectations. Letting go of shame. Letting go of the need to be validated and accepted by others in order to feel a sense of belonging. You get the picture. Since I’ve been on this path, I’ve gone to therapy, read books, explored my spirituality, and worked with different coaches….all in search of the tools that work for me in each situation.
When I look back on how I used to experience life, I see that I’ve made an amazing amount of progress in learning to let go. Even still, during the last month of 2018, I felt this strong push to revisit some areas I thought I’d already conquered. It’s hard to describe what I experienced, but to put it as simply as possible, thoughts, ideas, and situations that provided the opportunity to let go of things that felt heavy, things I wasn’t even aware I was still carrying on some level, kept presenting themselves over and over. And I didn’t miss the message because I got sick and was too exhausted to do much for a couple weeks. It was like the Universe isolated me in my home and took away all distractions to support me in paying attention to what I needed to do to move forward in the new year in order to be in alignment with where I want to be and how I want to feel.
I was clear on what was happening, which I consider a gift because I haven’t always been so astute when it comes to working on myself. I welcomed the opportunity and I learned that I had successfully gained the skill of knowing HOW to let go. All of my experimenting and practicing with different tools had finally enabled me to choose to let go on a visceral level in real-time. I was able to feel immediate release. That realization was exhilarating because it was a skill for which I’d hoped, prayed, and practiced for quite a long time. This experience also solidified my belief that life has many layers, and as we gain tools and understanding, peeling back each layer and going a bit deeper brings us closer to our truth and inner peace. I already believed letting go to be a daily practice, but I now see the goal of the journey as perpetual evolution as opposed to reaching a destination. Coming to know this not only disempowers my fears, it continues to encourage me to feel blessed when the opportunity to further let go and dive deeper into peace presents itself. I’m very much looking forward to all that 2019 brings me.